Signs that you are drinking too much coffee
* Juan Valdez names his donkey after you.
* You answer the door BEFORE people knock
* You converted your car's radiator so you can brew a pot on the way to work.
* You insist on calling every waiter "Jean Luc."
* When someone asks "How are you?" Your reply "Good to the last drop."
* The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
* Your face is on the Columbian postage stamp.
* Your thermos is on wheels.
* You can play ping pong without a partner.
* Your coffee filters are monogrammed.
* Your kids are named "Joe", "Jo" and "Java"
* Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
* You chew on other people's fingernails.
* You don't need a hammer to pound nails.
* You speed walk in your sleep.
* Your birthday is a national holiday in Columbia.
* Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
* You can jump start your car without cables.
* You listen to speed metal to relax.
* You can photograph yourself from ten feet away without a timer.
* You ski uphill. >* You have to watch videos in fast forward.
* You channel surf faster without the remote.
* You get a speeding ticket when your car is parked.