<< forwards doubt this one, but chuckled never the less... >> 

The following is an actual radio conversation released by the US Chief
of Naval Operations on 10/10/95:

NAVY:   Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a
collision.

CIVILIAN:  Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to 
           avoid a collission.

NAVY:  This is the Captain of a US Navy ship.  I say again,  divert
YOUR course.

CIVILIAN:  No.  I say again, divert your course.

NAVY:  This is the Aircraft Carrier "Enterprise".  We are a LARGE 
warship of the         United States Navy.  Divert YOUR course NOW!

CIVILIAN:  This is a lighthouse.  Your call.

***End of Radio Transmission***